We add Mark Anderson’s remarkable testimony, written by him just a few weeks before his death in March, 1990. He asked his home teacher to read it in fast and testimony meeting because he was too frail to speak. Mark was present when it was read, and he influenced once again a magnificent outpouring of the Spirit. How blessed we are to be left with such an inspiring written legacy to be cherished by all who can and should read and re-read it!
“I have asked Brother Mower – our faithful and loving home teacher – to read my testimony this morning so that you may understand more easily what I want to say. I almost prepared this testimony last month, and after hearing Bishop Ferrara’s testimony I realized how timely my thoughts have been. First, I want all of you to know that my assurance regarding the existence of our Heavenly Father and my everlasting relationship to Him has not been diminished by my illness. I feel similar confidence in the reality of my elder brother, Jesus Christ, as I gratefully contemplate the profound nature of His creation of the earth and of His infinite atonement in our behalf. I am sure that Jesus Christ continues to govern the affairs of this Church and of this world, according to the direction and by the authority of our Heavenly Father.
Our bishop referred last month to a question in the minds of some regarding Heavenly Father’s culpability or blame for the sore afflictions which befall some persons who are apparently living righteously. For some time I had been concerned that some of the youth in our ward might have these very thoughts as they witness my gradual deterioration due to a neurologic disease. I am eager to convince everyone among us that the very notion of blaming God for man’s difficulties is foolish and is evidence of spiritual immaturity.
First of all, which of us – other than Jesus Christ – has been so righteous that we don’t fully deserve whatever afflictions befall us in mortality? Consideration of the real purpose of mortality sheds further pertinent light upon the question of our blaming God for our difficulties, as we come to recognize that afflictions in mortality may be opportunities rather than punishments. We come here from a preexistent life during which Heavenly Father prepared us well for mortality. This life is both a time of learning from experiences and a time of testing to see how well we perform while apart from Heavenly Father. Father not only prepared us well before allowing us to “leave home,” but He also planned ahead so that we would have available whatever help and encouragement we need in order to continue to live properly here. But, Father was wise and loved us enough so that he didn’t remove all of the trouble from mortality. He knew that without afflictions we wouldn’t be tested, nor would we learn to progress during our mortality.
During the past several years I have seen clearly the potential eternal advantages afforded me by my illness. Just think of the opportunities and encouragement which have been mine to learn patience, unselfishness, humility, dignified long-suffering and enduring well through the trials imposed upon me by my disease. Are these not the very divine attributes upon which you and I are dependent every moment, every hour, and every day as we expect Father to be merciful, forgiving, and patient toward us? Reason assures me that before I may be exalted, I must acquire these attributes to the extent that Heavenly Father possesses them, and I must be willing to submit to whatever learning experience is required of me. In addition, Sister Anderson is learning many of the same lessons as she patiently meets my increasing needs.
Before becoming ill, I had anticipated a retirement consisting of a happy, healthy life to the age of ninety with plenty of time to enjoy Church service and close acquaintance with our grandchildren. Had my expectation been fulfilled, almost surely Missy and I would have been less likely to qualify for exaltation and eternal life than we will be as a result of my having been ill. Who among you would have sheltered us from these eternal advantages by eradicating my mortal illness? Is it not, after all, evidence of God’s love rather than something for which we ought to blame Him? The purpose of mortality is so important that we shouldn’t expect it to be easy. Remember, we are in the midst of a basic course in becoming Gods and Goddesses, a most demanding calling.
During my affliction, I have not measured up to the celestial mark at all times, but my illness has never prompted me to doubt God’s love for me. On the contrary, my spiritual insight has led me to consider it something of a divine compliment to be tried so severely during the terminal stage of my mortality. We are assured that “He chasteneth whom He loveth,” and that He will not try us beyond our ability to endure.
It is my hope that some of you will recall and be borne up by the eternal truths which I have addressed this morning if at a future time you are confronted by one of life’s severe challenges. Eventually I will be unable to share with you these choice meetings in which I have enjoyed bearing my testimony repeatedly. However, I feel quite certain that my faith in Heavenly Father and in His son Jesus Christ, and my testimony of the eternal truth will endure and pass with me into the Spirit World. I bear my testimony to you today gratefully and earnestly, in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.”